Posts Categorized: Travel

Doris of Reedsport, OR

I drove into the lush sunset for hours en route from Portland to Reedsport, delighting along the welcoming river through peaceful trees. I won’t mind surrounding myself with this view for a while. I should always remember OR-38 as a great road trip highway.

Doris of Reedsport hums while she scrambles eggs and bakes waffles at 9:00 p.m. for her tour guests. The song reveals itself: “All I Ask of You” from The Phantom of the Opera.

Doris started singing from the show once I’d introduced myself. However, it wasn’t the typical Christine, Christine! everyone at the Paramount sang whenever I walked into a room. Why didn’t I wait to apply to work for Seattle Theatre Group until after the touring production of Phantom closed? Oh, now I grow nostalgic for Anatoli and Linda and the other ushers from work.

My home this week is an original from the 1800s. I’m assigned to the Princess Suite complete with a miniature edition of The Little Mermaid on the nightstand. Doris decided to favor me before my tour partner and I set foot in her palace. My door has an old-fashioned latch complete with a skeleton key lock. This is another week of no phone and no internet in the home-stay. I’ll catch up on writing and reading.

In Plains, MT, Bob calls me Little Mermaid. He and Diane want me to visit through the weekend when I return post-tour. The backyard pool will be ready and Maury will prepare the horses for riding. Diane and Bob watch for cowboy boots to crop up in the town thrift stores. Perhaps while the dogs are groomed in Missoula, we can go to a boot store then.

Mother Hen Doris is quite a character, resemblant of Felonius Gru with her broad shoulders, barrel torso and skinny legs, sharp eyebrows and long, pointy nose with deep nostrils, and a faint wheeze when she breathes. She’s one of those Oregonians who add a bold “r” in “Warshington.” She avows, “The sign of a good cook is that they always serve their maple syrup hot.” Indeed.

I already admire her sense of humor. My tour partner Brian has two twin beds in his room, and he claimed he’d switch beds mid-week in order to enjoy both. When Doris pointed out the quilt rack in my room, she said, “And these are the quilts…if Goldilocks here gets cold,” pointing her thumb over her shoulder toward Brian.

She said something during our late waffle dinner that struck a chord. A boy named Adam, born of alcoholics, raised amidst turmoil, didn’t do well in public school. She said, “His brain didn’t connect; he had no conscience, no remorse.”

Is there such a thing? Can a human lack a conscience? And what would that look like? When she went on to describe his violence and scaring other children, I felt compelled to write a play about such a ten-year-old boy and tell his story.

She answered her rhetorical question “His future?” with a grand thumbs-down. Why was Adam cast aside so easily? As a long-term substitute in school, she taught him under the philosophy that “every day is a new day.” …but how did he run out of new days?

The yellow smiley face clock on my bedside table reports 10:07 pm. Downstairs, Doris’ TV murmurs on.

St. Valentine’s Plague

The week started on Monday with a cast-all for each of the sixty-three kids present at the audition. Minus one: a Pea-Wee was too overwhelmed at the audition and left before the cast announcements. One down, sixty-two to go.

When the first rehearsal started, a 16-year-old Scout quit, claiming a conflict. This wasn’t the first time a Scout quit within an hour of casting. Halfway through the first rehearsal, an assistant director quit with a similar excuse, yet she’d joined the final five minutes of the audition, begging us to be part of the show somehow. Five assistant directors wouldn’t hurt. A Seasider quit after the audition, too.

On Tuesday, another Scout quit. She was in tears trying to explain that she’s not usually a quitter, but she’s just not happy being in a group of kids out of her circle. We agreed on her changing to assistant director to keep her involved. Another student showed up with her mom, asking if she could still be in the show even though she was sick and absent from the first rehearsal. I said of course, and to come to the next rehearsal for the Seasiders. I have yet to see or hear from her again.

Come Wednesday, one of the remaining assistant directors agreed to taking over a vacant role, and we accommodated the blocking and dialogue to balance out this new twelfth player. Ilaya and Heather were out sick. In rehearsal, kids started dropping like Londoners in 1800. Our Gil had to mark his voice to ease a sore throat; Preston had to lay down; Molly had to sit out due to a sore leg.

Thursday. I excused Preston from rehearsal before we started; he vomited in the office while awaiting his ride. Casey the Pea-Wee had been home all day, sick from school. Ilaya and Heather were still missing. Molly sat out with a fever. I sent Gil home early to kick whatever bug started to bite his stomach, throat, and head. Laura was homesick, and an assistant director read Ophelia’s lines.

Friday morning, I got a call from Gil’s dad, who informed me of Isaiah’s infirmity, which sounded serious. Rumors were flying about why Heather wouldn’t perform: broken leg, sprained foot, birthday party…? Her stepmom straightened things out by informing us that Heather lives with her mom this weekend, out of town. Heather had said bupkis about any of this – she just disappeared. Preston was still home, recovering. Trace had to lie down during rehearsal with a sore stomach, and later, Hannah complained about an upset stomach. Laura rejoined us, but Jennifer (another assistant director) stepped in for Heather. Alex, our one male assistant director, saved me from performing Gil’s role.

By the time our audience arrived Friday evening, I applied three or four band-aids to bleeding arms and legs, retrieved ice packs for bonked heads and strained joints, and crammed wadded gauze in an infected ear. I used our costume kit’s hot glue gun to fix Sara’s broken shoe sole. Finally, our masking-turned-set-walls fell over onto the children both onstage and backstage at least twice during our run-throughs prior to showtime.

I have no memory of the performance. The costumes were sorted, the set pieces packed, and off we drove to the next town to start the entire process once again. Another school, another cast, another collection of maladies.